Ask Romana
Hello Romana,
I have a question regarding soul contracts. Sometimes it feels to me that we use them as an excuse to devolve ourselves of responsibility for things we've done that we feel guilt or shame about or have regrets about past behavior. Is there any truth in that? How do we avoid it? Thanks for your response. ~ Chris Franklin
Very thoughtful question, Chris, soul contracts tend to be a heavy topic.
Soul contract is a term often used interchangeably to describe the life contract or life plan previous to an incarnation, as well as the spiritual contracts we make with other individual souls that we have karmic bonds with which play key roles in our current life. Either way, contracts are carefully thought out individually as well as mutually - always with balance and purpose. Going through our human experiences, we find all kinds of ways to shirk responsibility and not hold ourselves accountable for various actions whether it's as mundane as not taking the trash out or more weighty like a failed marriage. So it makes sense that some may take the same approach when it comes to spiritual matters in their lives. If someone is prone to using excuses, they will find anything to point the finger at and that includes spiritual concepts.
So how to stay on track and avoid those situations?
First, keep in mind free will is always engaged and is absolutely necessary for proper growth and learning. Therefore, contracts are not set in stone like some may believe. Instead view individual contracts as assigned roles that are malleable and negotiable. The responsibility of how individuals decide to carry out their contract or agreement is solely up to them and will be evaluated once they've crossed back over after their incarnation during review. Unfortunately, many of us have been taught that emotions such as guilt, shame and regret are poisonous and will do whatever they can to avoid or deny those emotions. However, emotions have incredible purpose in our lives when kept healthy and used as a messenger to help facilitate growth. Heavy emotions like those mentioned only become poisonous when we hang on to them and allow them to fester and ferment within our beings.
To restore balance and progress, I recommend first recognizing what you are [or are not] responsible for. We cannot change others and any attempts to do so are futile. We can only control our perceptions, beliefs, actions and reactions and hold enough light and love to be able to encourage or positively influence change in another. The desire and decision to change is their responsibility and their journey.
When we recognize where responsibilities lie [including our own], we allow ourselves to establish boundaries that more clearly define our personal responsibilities versus another’s. We have the opportunity to connect with compassion as we recognize our own challenges and difficult emotions. Emotions provide valuable information and feedback to help us recognize opportunities to make different choices, actions and decisions when put in similar situations in the future.
Everything in life is a catalyst for growth. Respect and honor others along their journey as they practice their free will, including their choice to absolve responsibility for their behaviors, actions, reactions and decisions. Practice gratitude by recognizing any struggles within yourself they may mirror to you and send them love, compassion and well wishes as they sort through their realities. Then shift the focus back to your own responsibilities and accountability. Send yourself as much love and compassion as needed. Both are unlimited resources to help us heal and fuel our brave steps to move forward whether we chose to take a short cut or chose to take the long-scenic route.
Best to you, and all, on your journey.
~ Romana
Romana Powers is a black-belt psychic-intuitive, certified hypnotist and all around cool chick that helps clients around the world through personal readings and life-coaching. She blends her passion and knowledge of psychology with metaphysical knowledge to empower people to reach their highest potential. She is the proud owner of Our Psychic Powers, and is ranked as one of St. Louis's top psychics.
